Thoughts on the Game of Thrones trailer

www.youtube.com/watch?v=CuH3tJPiP-U

Wicked Game, hahahaha.

Well, it's not that funny but I'll take my laughs wherever they come.

Thoughts, in order, shot-by-shot--predictions in bold:

• You would think the Night's Watch would clean up their mess and not just leave Jon Snow lying there dead.
• Buncha slobs.
• Jorah found the ring. So predictable and SO GODDAMN DUMB. She flew there by air. How did they track her down?
• Here's an experiment for you: drop a ring in your garden, dont mow the lawn for three weeks and then you try to find it. Then do it again in the Eurasian steppes and have someone else find it. But don't tell them it's in the Eurasian steppes. Tell them it's somewhere in the world. Bet they can't find it!
• Awesome shot of the people walking under the horse hooves of Vaes Dothrak. Can't figure out why Daenerys might be surprised to be there. Where else are they gonna go? They got, like, one town.
• High Septon line is interesting.
• Is there going to be a full-scale revolution in Kings Laanding? Blah-blah-blah, democracy, mumble, mumble, mumble. Probably just one of those lines they think is cool but is ultimately hollow and meaningless
• Some Greyjoy banners blowing on a cloudy day:
• King's MOOT? I HOPE HOPE!!
• Littlefinger's line is cheesy but Sansa looks great in that Stark outfit. Like really beautiful.
• pawn to playah, baby.
• I become instantly annoyed at the sight of Tyrion's face. It's visceral, I can't help it. I can only hope he's going to free the dragons and will be fried in Quentyn's place. I know that's like sacrilege to show fans but I just hate show Tyrion. Sorry. Really, I am.
• Dragon flying, can't tell who it is.
• I guess Tyrion will free the dragons but won't get roasted. Someone will though. Bye bye Grey worm?
• Lancel vs the Frankengregor.
• My bet is on the monster.
• Tommen and Cersei walkin'.
• Trial scene.
• Horses running in slow-mo. Light looks like the North. Because it's always twilight there.
• Battle o' the Bastards most likely.
• Ships--
• Greyjoys invade.
• Bitch-waif slaps Arya hard.
• Everytime Maisie Williams moves it looks like she's counting while doing dance steps. Even when she's slapped.
• Somebody kills a wight with fire.
• Guys shoot bows in twilight-
• battle o' the bastards.
• Quick shot of Theon looking around like 'What the...?'
• Some guy getting baptized, Ironborn style.
• Jaime and Cersei:
• Let's see, Myrcella's dead, TIME TO a-DO IT! This one doesnt look rapey. At this point, Jaime who only has sex when his children die is wishing for more kids.
• Brienne kicking somebody's ass. My prediction:
• BRIENNE WILL KICK SOMEBODY'S ASS. in the battle o' the bastards.
• Surprisingly chintzy-looking computer generated House of Black and White, with candles.
• WE GET TO SEE MELLY's BREASTS AGAIN. Yay.
• Then she puts her hand on dead Jon Snow.
• OH. MY. GOD. MELISANDRE  IS TOTALLY GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH JON SNOW'S CORPSE and LITERALLY FUCK HIM BACK TO LIFE.. CALLING IT NOW. This show...
• Somebody jumps off a balcony? Is that supposed to be Arya?
• Shieldwall in twilight, battle o' the bastards.
• Some naked whore kissing someone, possibly another woman. SEXPOSITION AHEAD.
• Hooded beardy bloke de-hooding in the dark, guessing its a grey joy for some reason.
• A Greyjoy twirling swords around, Karl Tanner-style. Helmets, uncharacteristically on.
• THIS SEASON WILL BE THE YEAR OF THE HELMET.
• Battle with horses, and Tormund Thunderfart--
• is that JON SNOW IN THE BLURRY BACKGROUND OR JUST SOMEONE WITH THE SAME HAIR.
• Margaery repents.
• something weird happening in some dark dungeon
• Blind Arya looks like Peter Jackson's Frodo under the Ring's dark power.
• Looks like either Cersei's sic-ing an army on the Great Sept or the Great Sept has raised it's own army.
• Sansa running for her life in the woods.
• So she's running from Ramsay I suppose. Don't worry. Jonny Snow will save you. Or Brienne.
• Some beardy warrior types screaming and stuff.Battle.
• TV has finally discovered shield-walls, I'd say.
• Bran looks totally different than kid-Bran.
• That Night King behind him is just a vision though, it's totally his Luke-Skywalker-confronting-his-greatest fear-vision. It's not real.
• GAMe OF THRONES.
• What the hell is up with that T? Someone just went to down drawing that T. It's like they were on acid and just forgot to stop.
• Davos, draws LONGCLAW and says something about not being much of a fighter, apologies.
• I guess he's going to kill Melly. Or maybe she'll fuck Jon Snow back to life and then he'll behead Jon Snow because, ew.

overall pretty excited: I'm going to have LOADS to complain about in the coming months!

Written Wed • V